One thing I've learned since I've been married is that girlfriends are just as vital now as they were in college. I was super blessed that I attended a very social college, was in a sorority, and was always surrounded by an awesome group of girls!
After moving to a new city twice in two years, I understand how hard it is to make friends. In Illinois, I lived with two girls around my age which really helped me make friends (above). They invited me to hang out with their high school friends, attend girls night at a Mexican restaurant, and run 5k races. Now since I've moved to Beaufort, I'm really learning that you really have to put yourself out there to find women like you. There are a few young women (in their 20s and 30s) that I work with and work out with at the YMCA after work. The guys that I work with have wives that are in the same age group as well. I've applied to be a member of the Junior Service League to not only give back to my community, but fight a tight-knit group here in my new town. Tyler and I are seeking a church family and an important thing we are looking in while "church shopping" is young couples.
All but two of my closest girlfriends from my ZTA pledge class are getting together for Labor Day. The other friend who is unable to make it and I were talking today about how hard it is to be a friend and to really keep friendships going. Though we will always remain best friends, I think its important to also find women in your own town/city.
Girlfriends are so important. I cannot imagine not having a female to talk to about "girl" things. Whether it is talking about unimportant things, venting about a fight with your husband/fiance/boyfriend/fling, borrowing that favorite dress, or going to them when you need a shoulder to cry on, I just think it is vital for us as women to have other women in our lives!
And don't get me wrong, I love my virtual friends that I talk to all day everyday (hey Shannon and Megan), but there is just something about calling up a friend town to ask to join you for happy hour! Does anyone ever feel like it is a red flag when other women you know don't have girlfriends? I don't know what it is. Are they catty? Jealous? Spoiled? Bratty? Obnoxious? I have no idea but lately I've run into women that "don't do girls as friends" or end up ruining every relationship they have. And I hate that!
This post may have not made any sense at all, but I think it was one of those that was floating around in my head for a while and needed to get out! I guess I'm just thankful for my girlfriends - in Beaufort, at home, in DC, NYC, Florida, Charleston, Raleigh, Illinois, and even those that I've never met in person but can't wait to share a margarita with!
So cheers, friends!
5 comments:
It is so hard to make new friends in new cities! I think you're on the right path though. I loved Junior League but couldn't afford to stay in it. You're right, virtual friends can be awesome, but there is nothing like being able to call someone and say lets grab drinks!
It was so easy to make friends/maintain friendships in college! I miss having all of my close friends in the same town. Senior year I lived with seven other girls and it was so much fun - there was always someone to hang out with! Most of my really close friends live all around the country - Atlanta, Chicago, NYC, Florida, New Orleans, and several of my friends that lived here have moved away in the last year. It will be a really interesting transition with having a baby and maintaining friendships because I won't be able to just go out to bars or just hop on a plane to visit someone. I need to make some mom friends that are my age!
Love this! Miss my girlfriends dearly - moving away is so hard and missing stuff is even harder! I dream of the days I spent with my best friends just down the road or even sharing the same apartment with me. One day we will not be just virtual friends but will chat over margs - I promise!!
It's so hard to make friends as a grown-up, especially in a new town. That's something no one tells you, and you really can't believe it until you are IN the situation. Totally understand where you are coming from.
This is my life right now. You're right, college made making friends SO easy! I still have my group text with them going strong, but there's just something about being in the same place at the same time, and that's hard! I'm hoping once we settle down in a church family and I start working I will have more girlfriends. But I know EXACTLY what you mean. Love and miss you!
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